Bad Suns for President!

bad-suns cdBad Suns has just announced its candidacy for President of the United States.




bad-suns andi-elloway

I’ve written about Bad Suns before: reviewed their live show and interviewed them. This time around, in honor of the presidential election season shifting into high gear, frontman Chris Bowman was a good sport and played along. Although Bad Suns were left off the presidential debate slates, that doesn’t mean they don’t know how to run the country…right? The premise, as I told him, is this: You’ve just announced your candidacy for President of the United States. At your first press conference, you get the following questions:

Businessmen have been petitioning their representatives to allow shortsuits—suits with a jacket, tie, and shorts—in the workplace. Are you for or against this idea?

Look, I think it’s a great idea.

If you are elected, what will be the new national anthem?

“Kiss My Country Ass” by Blake Shelton or Hozier.

Voters have said they’re tired of the bald eagle as the national bird. What will you replace it with?

Seagull with full head of hair.

Wouldn’t you agree that growing an Abe Lincoln beard should be a prerequisite before the candidate-elect takes office?

It’s great to see the influence that our 16th president has had on modern baseball culture.

Would you listen to a citizens’ proposal to institute uniforms in the Senate and the House? (I’m thinking plaid…)

I’m thinking Arby’s.

Music and art programs in schools are being cut, while sports have generally remained constant. Which sport would you get rid of, via national referendum, to ensure kids can learn music in school?

I don’t want to have to pick a sport to get rid of. However, I would love to see art and music programs flourish in more schools. The art and music programs at my elementary school were great. I feel really, really lucky to have been able to learn about art and music from teachers who really cared. Music and art are a huge part of emotional development and expression at an early age, something that was vital for me.

As a corollary, who would you name to be the country’s Music Director of State?

Probably James Murphy.

What is the best reason a president would want to shake his or her Secret Service detail

To take a well-deserved night off, sipping champagne and listening to whichever is the most recent Guns N’ Roses album from the comforts of my own presidential suite. | Laura Hamlett

Band photo by Andi Elloway

About Laura Hamlett 467 Articles
Laura Hamlett is the Managing Editor of PLAYBACK:stl. In a past life, she was also a music publicist and band manager. Besides music, books, and other forms of popular culture, she's a fan of the psychology behind true crime and violent criminals. Ask her about mass murder...if you dare.

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