Lovefool 06.20.11 | United We Perv

A superhero movie marathon inspires Lovefool to poll her friends on their favorite superhero movie ladies. The results aren’t pretty.





My dear nerdlings, I am so sorry about my unexpected and unannounced break week. Sometimes life gets in the way and you have to spend a few days saying soothing things to yourself and that’s pretty much what I did last week instead of writing Lovefool. So sorry about that. I’m back this week, though, and I’ve brought friends.
This week, in order to justify snapping up some DVDs and spending an entire day watching superhero movies, I decided that I would seek the voice of the people and, lo, I would ask those people about superhero or superhero-related ladies that they’d like to be involved with. And I had to clarify very early on that I meant the whole package. I specified dinner three times a week and Saturdays at the zoo. We here at Lovefool are a class act and we do not hook up randomly at parties here. (These days, anyway.) I understand this may be a bit exclusionary due to the fact that I left out the gentlemen of comic books, but I believe I’ve already written about hot comic dudes. Kind of a lot, really. So I tossed it out there and the responses, to say the least, were interesting.
Answers tend to range from downright pervy at one end of the spectrum to sweetly respectful at the other. A few people answered with purposefully cynical choices. The ladies of Scott Pilgrim made a good showing, with four of them being mentioned. Girls seem to go for intriguing over hot. Liz Sherman of Hellboy, Selena Kyle of Batman (who was specifically cited as being pet-friendly) and Barbara Gordon (as Oracle and not the newly mobile and rebooted Barbara Gordon as Batgirl) were all mentioned. Guys were split pretty firmly down the middle: half of them really wanted to say that they wanted to date smart, sweetish girls. Rosario Dawson’s character in MIB2 came up several times, Pepper Potts a few times (each with the note that she was smart and beautiful) and Mary Jane Watson, once with the condition that the responder could cheat on her with Lady Deathstrike from X2. The other half of our male responders had to be repeatedly reminded that you actually have to date the girls, not just sleep with them. Enid from Ghost World even got a few mentions, which shocked me a little since her character was so stunningly unpleasant much of the time.
Of course, Scarlett Johansson’s recent turn as Iron Man‘s secret guardian angel, Black Widow, was mentioned once or twice, surprisingly once with the caveat that she was way out of someone’s league. I was surprised because that showed a startling self-awareness among the degenerated comment thread, which had descended into talking about oral sex with Mystique and Lady Deathstrike’s legs. (No, really. The things I do for you, nerdlings.) Ursula, Peter Parker’s landlord’s daughter and an excellent cook, apparently, was mentioned, which got a bit of an eyebrow from me. The cake had to come up? Really? Gwen Stacy, naturally, had a few fans, as well. Nostalgia played a role as a few older heroine types came up, too, such as Lana Lang from Superman III and Yvonne Craig’s high-stepping Batgirl from the 1960s Batman TV series. Adrienne Barbeau from Swamp Thing was cited with the tag #unrequitedteenlust. Wonder Woman, the older version, was also mentioned along with some criticism of your Lovefool’s question. In the middle, somewhere off in the 90’s, Jennifer Connelly’s retroglam turn in The Rocketeer got a few mentions.
So what’s the takeaway from this? Nerdlings have short memories and raging hormones tempered by hipster chicks and sassy ladies of the smart/snarky variety. Guys will still be interested in girls who are crazy, even if they’re fictional. There are 31 flavors of comic movie crush and, left unsupervised while your Lovefool marathons movies, any conversation like this will go one of two ways: discussions about sex or taunts of nerdiness. So I leave you with this thought: be kind to your fellow nerds, for you might just share the same common secret lusts. We are all one and we are all into redheads, apparently. | Erin Jameson

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