2 Days in New York (Magnolia Pictures, R)

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It’s the type of movie that thinks it’s automatically hilarious when a naked old man bends over.

film 2-days

I like Julie Delpy. I think she’s a talented actress (see White and Before Sunrise and Before Sunset) and writer (she co-wrote Before Sunset, among other things). But her new film, 2 Days in New York, a follow-up to her 2007 film 2 Days in Paris, is just awful. It feels like what would have resulted had Woody Allen directed a movie that was the worst of the gross-out movie boom in Hollywood circa the first couple of years of the new millennium. And it couldn’t be less inspired: French artist Marion (Delpy) and her American radio personality boyfriend Mingus (Chris Rock) have to endure the arrival of Marion’s family for a couple of days, and get thrust into untold stupid situations, like having a little boy pee on them while trying to measure his penis, or getting into trouble for relatives who are prone to smoking pot in the elevator in their building. And it’s also the type of movie that thinks it’s automatically hilarious when a naked old man bends over.

The family that comes to town and ruins Marion and Mingus’ lives are Marion’s father Jeannot (Albert Delpy, Julie’s for-real dad), her sister Rose (Alexia Landeau), and Rose’s boyfriend Manu (Alex Nahon), whom Marion once dated. But really, you don’t care how much their lives are ruined because everyone’s annoying anyway. Marion is perhaps the most insufferable person in the movie (perhaps by design). The straight man to it all is Mingus, and it seems like anyone going to see this movie will have an opinion of Chris Rock going into it—this seems a strange role for him to be in. And while I like Rock, generally speaking, he is horribly miscast here, but his character’s written so poorly it’s hard to entirely fault him.

Really, about the only nice thing I have to say about the movie is that I was amused by a third act cameo by Vincent Gallo, playing himself. Delpy’s kind of playing the Gallo game with this movie where she writes, directs, stars, produces, and God knows what else in the film. Besides, I like Vincent Gallo. Around the same time that he pops up, Marion is hosting a new art opening of her work, and she winds up ranting at an art critic about how if he hates her show he should just tell her so. On that note, Julie Delpy: I hate your newest movie. | Pete Timmermann

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