You won’t find me

I’ve been taking note of stores, shops, places I never go, and never will go. It inspired me to make this list of places you won’t find me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

There’s thing about being an adult, this time when you suddenly realize, "I will never do X again…"

I had that flash today, driving past an elementary school, where schoolgirls were playing field hockey. I never liked field hockey, so the fact that I’ll never again pick up that wooden stick ("Hockey one, hockey two, hockey three!") is no great loss. But it’s weird to think of all the things you were exposed to (forced into?) as a child, and how, as an adult, they all fall away, one by one.

It’s nice to be able to make our own choices, lead our own lives. But how many of us discovered unknown interests and loves because of something someone made us do?

I’ve also been taking note of stores, shops, places I never go, and never will go. It inspired me to make this list of places you won’t find me.

  1. A nail salon
  2. A hunting trip
  3. A jewelry store[a]
  4. A pawn shop
  5. The taxidermist
  6. A strip club[b]
  7. A casino[c]
  8. A golf match (are they even called matches? games?)
  9. A horror movie
  10. A rollercoaster[d]
  11. A marathon[e]
  12. A college football game
  13. A country music concert (and I mean country)
  14. A dog show
  15. A tobacconist
  16. Ruth’s Chris Steakhouse
  17. A monster truck pull
  18. Singing-and-dancing musical theater
  19. Babies R Us
  20. Medical school

Notes: [a] I was asking Jim the other day if women really enjoy getting expensive jewelry as gifts; he assured me that a lot of them did. Hmm. I would rather have a ferret. [b] I have been to one, and I suppose there’s always a chance I’ll end up at another one crazy night. But it’s nothing I really seek out for fun, y’know? [c] I suppose I should never say never, but if I’m there, it’s because somebody else dragged me. [d] Sadly, I fear my rollercoaster days are over. [e] As are my marathon days, according to me knee. Not that they were anything spectacular, but it’s still a pretty cool thing to have done. And I did really like running…at least in theory.

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