Delirious Nomad | 06.06

The zipping funny cars and marshmallow-wheeled dragsters are a powerful sight—and smell—so you may want to bring sunglasses, an oxygen tank, suntan lotion, a small lunch, binoculars, your tube top, an athletic supporter, and a stuffed Garfield.

 

 

Do not attempt to fight the healing power of Elvis, his imitators, his chefs, or his pharmacists. Steve Davis has been performing his tribute to the King for decades now, and his stretchable jumpsuits alone are worth the drive to Jefferson Barracks Park to see him croon and swivel as part of the Oldies by the River concert series sponsored by St. Louis County Parks. (June 3, $8–10, www.stlouisco.com)

Is macramé one of the punk disciplines? Well, sure—and funky candles, fun magnets, cool posters, one-of-a-kind journals, and loads more are pretty punky, too, if they’re available at the Rock ’n’ Roll Craft Show. Last year’s show offered a winning combo of loud music and high-quality homemade stuff, and this year’s 75 artists and 10 bands should be bitchin’, too. (June 3–4, 6933 Hampton, www.rocknrollcraftshow.com)

The twisted trunks of the tiny trees at the Bonsai Society of Greater St. Louis Show & Sale bespeak of pain and sorrow, all scrunched up into a cute little reminder of fleeting time and dreams deferred. Won’t somebody transplant them to a bigger pot and let them live, fergodsakes! Let them grow. Let them love. (June 3–4, Mo. Botanical Garden, www.mobot.org)

If a film could taste like bongwater accidentally snorted into the throat, Dazed & Confused would most assuredly be that film. The scene in which Slater is almost too stoned-stupid to hide a bag of pot when a parent is about to enter the room is every bit as chilling as The Exorcist in its most piss-yourself moment. Yeah, dude—the fear is palpable. Drink and sup while Webster Films screens the Richard Linklater opus at Strange Brew: Cult Films at Schlafly Bottleworks. (June 7, 314-968-7487, www.webster.edu/filmseries.html)

The annual International Horseradish Festival in Collinsville is the perfect way to prepare for summer. The final “spring cleaning” is the cleaning of your sinuses, accomplished when you eat a big ol’ festival turkey leg dredged through a puddle of ripping-hot horseradish mayo. Bring a hankie or do the “nature blow,” either way you’ll feel positively continental while you enjoy snacks, beer, live music, the “Little Miss Horseradish” pageant, and more. (June 10–11, www.horseradishfestival.com)

You’ve tasted bongwater. You’ve blown out your membranes with horseradish right from the farm. Now, it’s time to mutate your cells by inhaling the noxious vapors of burning nitromethane fuel at the annual NHRA O’Reilly National Drag Races at Gateway Raceway. The zipping funny cars and marshmallow-wheeled dragsters are a powerful sight—and smell—so you may want to bring sunglasses, an oxygen tank, suntan lotion, a small lunch, binoculars, your tube top, an athletic supporter, and a stuffed Garfield. Wait—forget Garfield. That cat’s too slow. (June 23–25, www.gatewayraceway.com)

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